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August 26th, 2010

07:49 pm - Too funny not to share
>In her radio show, Dr Laura Schlesinger said that, as an observant
>Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus
>18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance.
>The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura, written by a US man,
>and posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative:
>Dear Dr. Laura:
>Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I
>have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that
>knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend
>the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that
>Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination ... End of
>I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other
>elements of God's Laws and how to follow them.
>1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and
>female, provided they are from neighboring nations. A friend of mine
>claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you
>clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
>2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in
>Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair
>price for her?
>3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her
>period of Menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is how
>do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.
>4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a
>pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors.
>They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
>5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus
>35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated
>to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?
>6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an
>abomination, Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than
>homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this? Are there
>'degrees' of abomination?
>7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I
>have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading
>glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room
>8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair
>around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev.
>19:27. How should they die?
>9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes
>me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
>10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two
>different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments
>made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also
>tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go
>to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them?
>Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family
>affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)
>I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy
>considerable expertise in such matters, so I'm confident you can help.
>Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.
>Your adoring fan.
>James M. Kauffman, Ed.D. Professor Emeritus,
>Dept. Of Curriculum, Instruction, and Special Education
>University of Virginia

PS (It would be a damn shame if we couldn't own a

(2 monologues | soliloquize)

May 13th, 2010

02:37 pm
My 9-year-old today "Skorts are like mullets for your butt"

(2 monologues | soliloquize)

May 12th, 2010

08:22 pm
My choral director who has been telling me that she has everything under control, came to me today and told me that there are three songs she still has not taught.

We open in three weeks.

Today was her last rehearsal with them.

Friday we start running with sound.

Hmmmmm . . . .

She is working two jobs right now, and I just don't think she is managing well. I've been a bit concerned about her, is what I'm saying. This behaviour is atypical, though the kids assure me that no, it is not. They came to me in a flock yesterday, bitching to me that it always happens this way and that this year they feel particularly unprepared.

Well, I am actually very well prepared, and if I need to give her a couple of rehearsals I can do that.

Tomorrow, we techno-glo the stage.

(2 monologues | soliloquize)

May 6th, 2010

05:11 pm
Test drove said truck today; all is a go go go. Meeting with James tomorrow. Have all my alibis lined up and my ducks in a row . . . so EXCITED!

(2 monologues | soliloquize)

December 24th, 2009

04:29 pm
Happy Holidays everyone! May your days be merry and bright!


December 14th, 2009

07:59 pm
1441 cookies this year, folks. It was a sugar-coated sight to behold. I am divvying them up tomorrow, however, as right now I need sleep.

(1 monologue | soliloquize)

December 11th, 2009

05:20 pm
I don't know why so many people waste so much of their precious life being unhappy.

(2 monologues | soliloquize)

September 24th, 2009

10:21 pm
The Scottish play has taken over my life.

(1 monologue | soliloquize)

September 15th, 2009

05:30 pm
"There's the gift, there's the spirit, and there's the work - all three have to come together. If one of those things is off, it can stop you from becoming who you were meant to be." JAY-Z


August 25th, 2009

05:37 pm
Don't let somebody become a priority in your life when you are just an option in theirs.


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